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"I'm not sure I fully understand the traditions of this race," said general Zhlag, "but I don't think that's normal."

"You there!" called the commander. "Human. What are you doing?"

"I just want to talk for a minute," he shouted across the blasted field. "Don't shoot!"

"I've read about this," said the general. "Isn't a white flag more traditional?" he shouted to the messenger.

"We're in the middle of a war!" the messenger replied. "Not a lot of white flags handy."

"I suppose practical matters sometimes require one to deviate from tradition, but I've never heard of somebody calling a truce with a cat on a stick."

"Well, like I said. Not a lot of white flags around at the moment."

"It's not even a white cat!"

"Not a lot of white cats, either."

General Zhlag decided not to draw attention to what must already have been an embarrassing matter. "I take it you are speaking on behalf of the Earth people. What is it you wanted to say?" he asked.

"Just one thing," replied the messenger: "Sic him, Mittens!"

The cat launched itself from the pole like a fluffy cannonball, latching onto the general's face.

"Aargh!" yelled the general. "Retreat!!! Retreat!!!"

"I say," said the commander, sipping his space tea. "I don't pretend to be an expert, but I thought it was supposed to be dreadfully unsportsmanlike to use a white flag like that. It might even be a war crime."

"Well," shrugged the messenger, "it's lucky it was just a cat, then, isn't it?"
Inspired by a moment in Family Guy when Peter Griffin, during a brief standoff with the US Army, asks his dog Brian: "Can I tie you to a pole and use you as a white flag?"

Despite having posted a journal about the #WritersInk October Write Off, I got distracted and didn't get started until about fifteen minutes before the end. ^^; Whoops. This is the product of the only round I was there for--prompt words Deviate and Race--and somewhat inexplicably has made it into the Shortlist.

See the Shortlist here: [link]

Daily Literature Deviation: January 4th, 2013
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:icondoodelay:
Doodelay Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Student Writer
:XD: so dignified
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:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Jan 12, 2013   Writer
:iconbritishplz: One must always maintain one's composure.
Reply
:icondoodelay:
Doodelay Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Student Writer
:XD: so dignified
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013   Writer
:iconhummingbirdplz: Featured here [link]
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013   Writer
Thank you so much! :-)
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013   Writer
Seen about a week to ten days, then replaced.
Lit gets moved around a lot in my journal.
Still, I'm glad it was there and look forward to more by you.
Oh--and you're welcome :D
Reply
:iconlaeneris:
Laeneris Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Student Writer
The cat launched itself from the pole like a fluffy cannonball, latching onto the general's face. :rofl: My jaw muscles!
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013   Writer
:slow: Glad you like it.
Reply
:iconlaeneris:
Laeneris Featured By Owner Jan 7, 2013  Student Writer
:laughing:
Reply
:iconhavetales-willtell:
HaveTales-WillTell Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013  Professional Writer
There's only one possible response to this:

:iconshakecatplz::iconexclamationpointplz:

Congrats on a well-deserved DLD.
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013   Writer
:laughing: That's...definitely one possible response. Thank you. :iconcrazycatladyplz:
Reply
:iconhavetales-willtell:
HaveTales-WillTell Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2013  Professional Writer
:D My pleasure.
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013   Writer
Congrats on the DLD "Pick of the Day." What a surprise! Really. And very pleasing. Kinda' like many cats are.
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013   Writer
Wow! :D That is a surprise (and cats are indeed pleasing). Thanks for the feature!
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013   Writer
:) :iconwelcomeplz:
Reply
:icondailylitdeviations:
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Jan 2, 2013
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by =DailyLitDeviations and has been selected as our "Pick of the Day". It is featured in a news article here: [link] and on our main page.

Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article. Keep writing and keep creating.
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
xlntwtch Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2012   Writer
Congratulations on the short list at #WritersInk's. I'd say you did a grand job. Thanks to you, I'm laughing now. :+fav:
Reply
:iconrovanna:
Rovanna Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2012   Digital Artist
:D You made me lol! I like it when lit makes me lol. Space tea... omg.
Reply
:iconmajorasmasks:
MajorasMasks Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2012  Professional Artisan Crafter
Funny and original, I'm voting this in the poll. Good luck! ^^
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2012   Writer
Glad you liked it. :-) And thanks for the support.
Reply
:iconheronwolf:
heronwolf Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Hahaha, love it!
Reply
:iconintricately-ordinary:
intricately-ordinary Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Ahh this made me laugh out loud! Wonderful!
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2012   Writer
Thanks. :D Glad you liked it.
Reply
:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
well, that was bizarre, to say the least, but fun!

nice work :)
Reply
:iconmonstroooo:
monstroooo Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I loved this one - it made me openly laugh out loud. Twice. Not much literature does that - very well done!

I did think it was a slightly sketchy play on the prompts (the 'race' aspect seemed to get left behind), but that's fine. This was just so much fun :la:
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2012   Writer
Yeah, the "race" element is hazy enough that even I'm not totally sure how well it ties in. It's definitely not vital to the story: I was mostly relying on a vague sort of culture shock situation to carry it.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, though: coming up with something a little absurd seemed like a safe bet, but you can never tell how these things will turn out. :shrug:
Reply
:iconirideamagicalladle:
IRideAMagicalLadle Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Ohmygod!:worship: you must surely be one of the most brilliant writers EVER!!!
How oh HOW are you not world famous?!??
Reply
:icondamonwakes:
DamonWakes Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2012   Writer
:blush: That may well be the biggest compliment anyone's ever given me.

But really I've still got a long way to go. :XD: At the very least, I'll hold off on any hopes for fame until I've actually got at least one novel out. Even then, it doesn't really seem like the thing to aim for: I'd rather make just one person laugh out loud than leave a hundred with mildly amused smirks. Especially if the story wasn't meant to be funny to begin with. That would be a total misfire.
Reply
:iconirideamagicalladle:
IRideAMagicalLadle Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:hug: but still, you are epic!
Reply
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